“On Honest Conversations in Online Dating”

“Was I really being too much? Three months ago, I tried getting to know someone through online dating. He seemed nice, and he was already looking to settle down. As for me, within just 30 minutes, I asked him about his long-term plans in life.

He asked why I wasn’t considering having children anymore. For me, I could reconsider having kids if I could provide for all their educational, material needs, and wants. If possible, I’d think about it. But honestly, I just want a partner to travel and enjoy life with me — someone I won’t get tired of talking to and trying new things with.

Then, we got into calculations. How much does school in Metro Manila cost? Tutors, training, daily food, diapers. Long-term educational plans. And of course, if you want to have a cup of coffee or unwind and travel abroad from time to time. Or if you want your child to take piano lessons, soccer, or whatever.

In short, we didn’t get along from that point. He said that whatever I envisioned for my future child was too much — ‘OA’ (over the top). It was just basic computation, the lowest possible estimate. And he just said, ‘Well, move to the province.’

He had a point. It just wasn’t me. I won’t do it. I politely said goodbye. He did too.